Integrity

People die everyday...and people fall in and out of love everyday. The ways of the world we live in. Makes me wanna go into hibernation sometimes and wake up whenever...when I'm ready to embrace, to face whatever challenge, obstacle and heartache that life will bring on next. Statistically, I have not even lived half of my life yet. A majority of our elders will say, "You youngsters today don't know what hardship and suffering is all about. During MY time.....bla bla bla..."

Yes, I might be whining unnecessarily, incessantly and sound like I've been to hell and back but sometimes we like to rub more salt to the wound, you know what I mean? Moreover, being a pessimist does not help as I tend to weigh the negatives more than the positives. Can't help it. It's my nature. To shoot myself repeatedly, exactly at the same spot. To stab myself and twist the knife unerringly at the same spot. To murder myself emotionally precisely at the same spot.

I can hear Ms Spears aka Mrs Federline's tune in my head now. Gosh, I hope she divorces the useless bum soon. One celebrity couple which I hope will head down splitsville at full speed. Hhmm, perhaps maybe it's really luuurve. Naaah! Yes, I confess. I am a Britney fan. So laugh at me. I don't care. I like her. I think she deserves someone better than Kevin the Freeloader. But then again, I'm not her and she's not me. The love does not choose who it wants to heart.

She's so lucky...she's a star...but she cries cries cries in her lonely heart thinking...

If there's nothing missing in my life...then why do these tears come at night...

The dictionary states that 'integrity' is the state of being complete, being whole - the quality or condition of being whole or undivided; completeness.

Sigh, I wanna feel integrity in me again...